I had the perfect childhood. I had a big yard to play in, friends all around my neighborhood, the closest family unit, and I had faith. I loved God so much when I was little I would look forward to praying every night or talking about Bible stories with my grandma. But when I got to the end of middle school and could see high school around the corner my perfect childhood started to end. My family was shaken from my grandfather’s passing. It sounds very privileged to say but until then nothing bad had ever happened to me. After that though, it felt like nothing but bad things happened to me. I faced a chronic illness, my mom got diagnosed with cancer, my other grandpa passed away, I was losing my relationship with my sister. These are all terrible things but I still think one of the worst things was that I lost my faith and my belief in God. When this happened, I became the most negative, the most mean, the most depressed I had ever been in my life. I had lost all confidence in myself and in the world. I went through my whole high school experience this way and by the end I knew I needed to change. I couldn’t continue to be this unhappy. So, when I went to college I wanted to totally reinvent myself. I was determined to be a more positive and kinder version of myself. I wanted to tap into the happy little kid that once was. That meant tapping back into my faith. I knew it would be a long and hard journey for me but I sincerely wanted to try again. I thought that in college I would have a hard time finding someone to relate to in faith. There is such a stigma in our generation and so many people who don’t believe. I was so lucky to find my first best friend within one day of moving into college. I am so thankful for her. She immediately shared her faith and her beliefs with me and helped me start to find my faith again after only knowing me for such a short time. I started to bond with my grandma again over faith. I did my own research and reading. I found God again and I was never so happy. Bad things still happen. My grandma who I shared so much about my religion with passed away. My mom, who is my rock and best friend, had a stroke. But this time instead of pushing God away I held Him close. I feel the pain but God helps me through it. I am the happiest I have ever been right now and I know that is because of my faith. Bad things still happen but with God by my side I know I won’t lose myself again.
-Maya Hackman- Allegheny College